Artist’s renderings in lieu of photographs

New York–based rock act VietNam performed at The Garage on May 8, 2013. Local support by Max Payne & The Groovies and The Breakers. I was assigned to photograph and review the performance for SLUG Magazine. The next evening as I sat down to edit the photos and write the review, to my horror, I discovered that I had accidentally formatted and reused the memory card that contained the photos from the show. There was absolutely no hope – no witchcraft, no computer trickery, no virgin I could sacrifice to any demonic deity – NOTHING was going to bring these images back.

SO… I did the next best thing.  I drew pictures and submitted them to my editor:

nuke2The Breakers opened up the show with bombastic style.

beerLocal man poses with frosty mug of  Uinta Cuthtroat Pale Ale.

maxpayneMax Payne’s grooves are so groovy, it’s almost painful.

congaGirl banging on a conga drum on stage with VietNam. Given that she wasn’t thrown off the stage, she is probably a new member, or more than likely, the singer’s new girlfriend that he met in Madison, Wisconsin last week.

kissingTwo bar girls kiss each other in a desperate attempt to garner some male attention. It’s a good start girls, keep it up!

vietnamMichael Gerner fronts a band named after a war that destroyed millions of innocent lives and was based on lies and media manipulation. So retro!

singer2VietNam’s Michael Gerner flirts with the fine line between looking like you are really so poor and starving of a musician that all you can afford to wear is a Hello Kitty sweater, and the conspicuous consumption of thrift store goods that Macklemore has made insanely mainstream.

singVietNam’s Michael Gerner gives a dramatic pause before launching into his latest epic composition, “Of nerve agent and photography”.

singer 3

Gerner tries to pretend that he’s not wearing a wicker road cone on his head.

bassplayerThe bass player for VietNam played with his back to the audience the entire time.

singer 4The fans listen intently as Gerner emotes.

violinNathanael “Lefty” Maynard rocked the violin, stage left.

singer 5Gerner sheds a tear as he sings the sad song…

stoked kidLocal kid loses his shit as the band roars into a crescendo of random conga hits, scratchy violin squeaks, drum beats and sick back-facing bass lines. Being the only one of his friends that have heard that there’s such a thing as “classic rock”, he also feels most entitled to be stoked out of his mind.

singer 6Gerner reaches the climax of the song, to wild applause from the audience.

thedeadAn aerial shot of the floor at The Garage: The aftermath of tonight’s show.

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