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6. No fear, no guile, no regrets

*** Did you arrive in the middle of the story? Start at the beginning ***

* * * * * * * * * * * *

This is what victory looks like.

This is my Dad, the original Duane – standing in the place where his accident happened.

He stands tall, humbly yet powerfully on the plot of ground that tried to take everything from him.  He stands in gratitude, for though he lost his old life, he was given a chance to create a new one.

He is the victor.

Life was not easy for him. Not only did he have a hard time doing the things that you and I take for granted and often do too much of:

eating and talking –

but he knew what it was like to be “normal”, and had to live with the knowledge he’d never again be like he used to be.

My Dad had every reason in the world to be bitter, angry, resentful…

…never was there a more humble, grateful, peaceful man than my Dad. He radiated joy. Even though he was kind of awkward to try to converse with, he seemed to make friends everywhere he went.

His soul was completely devoid of fear, guile, or regret.


Feb 2013

I’m driving my parents around downtown Salt Lake City to run some errands. We pull up to an intersection, and in the lane next to us, is a guy on a big noisy Harley.

My Dad looked over at the biker. His face lit up. A smile spread across his face. He slowly nodded his head a few times in the affirmative, as if to say, “If I could get on that bike right now, I’d do it in a heartbeat. I regret nothing.”

There are times in life when knowing arrives.

Knowing doesn’t come with a lot of fanfare, it doesn’t need any. Truth is truth and is secure in itself. No amount of wrapping paper or bolstering will change the facts. It is plain. It is simple.

In that moment, a small but certain switch flipped inside of me. Despite the fact it would destroy my mother…

I knew with total clarity:

I will get a motorcycle.

I will learn to ride.

I will do important work on the road.

I will make my Father proud.

I will break the cycle of fear.

The only relevant questions at this point were:

  1. what kind of bike
  2. when


Next: motorcycle messengers







Borderline Personality Disorder: The Interview Collection

One of the most popular topics on the show over the years has been Borderline Personality Disorder. Apparently a lot of us have had to deal with it in one way or the other. I’ve done three major shows on it. Here they are, for your convenience:

Rachel, a self proclaimed and officially diagnosed – AND RECOVERED – Borderline, shares her journey with us: http://www.paulduane.net/2015/06/recovery-from-borderline-personality-disorder/

An interview with Rachel’s husband Grant about what it’s like to be married to a Borderline: http://www.paulduane.net/2015/07/being-married-to-a-borderline/

Therapist Scott Carter talks about Borderline Personality disorder: http://www.paulduane.net/2015/03/scott-carter-on-borderline-personality-disorder/


SB 73 Senate undecided list : 11 Feb 2016

19 FEB 2016 UPDATE

We’ve got enough votes in the senate for SB73 to pass. At this point – messages of positivity, gratitude, support, etc, are the best thing to be sending to your senator.

It has come to my attention that some people have been sending “hate mail” to legislators.  Let me be exceedingly clear about this:

If you have sent hate mail, you have HURT our cause.

Hate mail does NOTHING to pursuade a strong minded person to a new point of view. THINK ABOUT IT.

Okay, back to the positive!  Let’s send them thank you notes for supporting Utah’s patients and supporting SB 73.

Click here for an  easy way to look them up: http://goo.gl/omGflb



4 Feb: Call To Action re: Medical Cannabis

Okay, this one is time sensitive, folks. 

Today, both of the medicinal cannabis bills are in committee at the capital. This is a critical stage where the bill can either continue to live, or die. Your involvement TODAY (4 Feb) is very important at this stage. Here’s the short story: Senators Daw & Vickers are sponsoring a bill  which is a very limited cannabis bill that does not allow whole plant marijuana to be sold – only extracts with limited uses. This bill needs to be defeated.
Senator Madsen’s bill, SB73, allows for whole plant cannabis to be sold and has good provisions in place to make sure those who need it can easily get it. This bill needs to succeed.

TODAY (4 Feb), both bills will be considered in committee. This is a stage where senators and representatives may be making up their mind as to which way they will vote. Our elected representatives need to know what the will of the people is. Please stop what you are doing and take 5 minutes to send an email or make a phone call to your elected representative to let them know you want them supporting Madsen’s bill, SB73.

How to easily get in touch with your elected officials:

When communicating with your elected representative, make sure these things happen:

  • Communicate with utmost professionalism when you contact your representatives.  Treat it like an important job interview.
  • If you have a personal medical condition, or someone you are close to has a condition that can be treated with medicinal cannabis, please include a short explanation of how it would benefit you or your loved one.   It’s critical that our lawmakers see the value that cannabis has as a MEDICINE.
  • This is not about recreational weed folks. That’s a different topic for another day. Don’t even bring it up. Many of the more conservative legislators are afraid that this bill will just serve, and create, a bunch of “pot heads”. They need to be assured that this is MEDICINE that will be used responsibly.
  • Make sure you are specific in asking that they support SB73, and NOT the bill proposed by Daw / Vickers.

The two committee meetings are at 2pm and 4pm today, 4 Feb, so time is of the essence. Take 5 minutes and do it now! Let’s get this done!

much love –

Paul Duane

P.S. This just in: please take a minute to also write the committee members:


Burning Man Recap with Steve Conlin

On today’s show, I give a recap of SOME of my experiences and thoughts on Burning Man.  Check out photos and essays from Burning Man 2013 here: www.paulduane.net/tag/burning-man-2013

And check back periodically for updates- I’ll be posting photos, interviews, essays, etc, from Burning Man 2015 here:  www.paulduane.net/tag/burning-man-2015

Check out Steve Conlin’s photographs of Burning Man here: http://midlifesimplicity.com/2015/09/burning-man/